She Joined the Club

What club you ask?

It’s a club no one wants to join

It’s the dead parents club.

I am NOT trying to be disrespectful so please hear me out.

A few months ago, I was watching reruns of Gray’s Anatomy. There was a scene where Christina Yang was talking to a George O’Malley. His father had just died and this is what she said:

“There’s a club. The dead dad’s club. You can’t be in it until you are in it. You can try and understand and you can sympathize but until you feel the loss you will never understand. I’m really sorry you had to join the club George.”

George responses, ” I don’t know how to exist in a world where my dad doesn’t.”

Christina replies, ” Yeah that never really changes.”

I’m in the club.

I have friends and family who are in the club.

NO ONE WANTS TO BE IN THE CLUB but it will happen.

Last weekend……. it happened to my best friend.

I’ve been privileged to walk beside her. To listen and be apart of her story for a couple of years now.

Are you ever in awe of another person?

I wanted to make sure that I understood the real definition of awe, so I looked it up and the definition is:

an overwhelming feeling of reverence, admiration, fear, etc., produced by that which is grand, sublime, extremely powerful, or the like

Yep I was right.

In awe of her strength

In awe of her compassion for others

In awe of her Love for Jesus.

As I lived life with her the last few weeks, I’ve watched her travel back and forth to Georgia to care for her ailing parents. Not just one parent, but both.

I’ve listened to stories of family dysfunction and heartache and then watch her do it afraid.

Last Friday, her father met Jesus.

Last Monday, her mother joined her father.

How does one deal with the death of both parents at the same time?

I’ve struggled for almost a year at the loss of Dad and I hate being in the club.

Absolutely, Positively hate it.

The services were planned. They would have one service for her parents. Two caskets at one time. How does one deal with such heartbreak?

Jesus. He is the only one who will fill the void of despair.

Friends are a gift straight from Him and there is no other explanation for the friendship we have.

It’s a gift.

We asked “Can we come to funeral?”

And her response was “It’s so far. You have busy lives and I’ll be just fine.”

Well sometimes you do it anyways.

You get in the car with your people and you just go anyways

The look of surprise and relief as we entered the Memorial Chapel was all we needed to know that we did the right thing.

Tears of Joy

Hugs of compassion and knowing that we were in the exact place we were supposed to be.

We all have matching bracelets and of course we all had them on. It’s just another way of supporting the ones you love.

There can even be smiles

Squeeze your people tight.

If something nudges you to call someone, DO IT.

If you are supposed to travel 10 hours in one day to support your people during one of the hardest days, just do it.

Sometimes there are no do-overs.


About Charmadawn

Jesus lover 💜 Wife of Steve for 36 years 💜 Mom to 2 grown kiddos 💜 BB to grandsons Jack, Luke and Patrick Joseph 💜5 years ago we purchased, Rescued and Restored a 118 year old farmhouse and we live together as a multigenerational household. Come follow our crazy. Isaiah 54:7
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