January 2020 Accountability

This is not about you

Or you

Or you

It’s just my thoughts

It comes from experiences and conversations. It comes from time and living life.

2020 is my year to turn down the noise. It requires part of my brain that doesn’t work quite as well as the other half. It requires me to actually check in with myself and make sure things are going the way they should.

A few things I have pondered on…..this month of January 2020.

1. I am an extroverted introvert. I love to be around people and I think I am liked. But enough is enough. I can’t go non-stop. I can’t have plans more than a couple times a week or I start to fall apart. I need time alone to recharge and I need people at the same time. It sounds kind of selfish when I type it out but it is who I am and I will protect myself. I’ve done pretty good this month. A whole 26 days! Go me!!

2. I have a pretty small circle. I don’t trust well and I am cautious about who I bring into my circle. Recently I have felt the circle might still be too big. Turning down the noise will require conversations and restrictions. I don’t like it. I don’t like confrontation and I might have to throw up before it happens.

3. I live in a pool of guilt. I feel guilty for being happy. I feel guilty feeling sad. I feel guilty for the life I have. I feel guilty for _______________. Name it. I probably feel it. No one thinks these things. It’s all me. I’m working on taking those handcuffs off and letting myself out of jail.

4. I want those that I love to know I love them. I am interested in you. I want to know your love language so that I can fill your love tank. I’m working on this one. BIG TIME.

Kolbe BRYANT died today. Along with his teenage daughter. Even celebrities don’t know the day they will take their last breath. No one knows the day they will meet their maker. No one knows when they will stand at the feet of Jesus and account for our lives. So many loved ones have gone before us just this month. So many friends are grieving.

I don’t know who reads my words. It might be many and it might be few but we have a responsibility to speak Jesus in front of everyone. I don’t want to stand before Jesus and have to explain why I kept silent.

Do you?

I read the note below today. I wish I could text my Dad today.

Have a fantastic week,


Today, I hope you remember to…

Dance in the kitchen.

Laugh over pizza.

Cuddle on the couch.

Invite people over.

Leave the mess.

Hold your babies.

Kiss your husband.

Tell your wife she’s beautiful.

Text your dad.

Call your momma.

Show up for your friends.

Be kind to strangers.

Share your favorite joke.

Remember old stories.

Say your prayers.

Express your gratitude.

Write in your journal.

Read in the Good Book.

Breathe in the moment.

Let go of hate.

Hold onto joy.

Help the hurting.

Give a little more.

Worry a little less.

Love a lot harder.

Don’t take any of it for granted.

About Charmadawn

Jesus lover πŸ’œ Wife of Steve for 36 years πŸ’œ Mom to 2 grown kiddos πŸ’œ BB to grandsons Jack, Luke and Patrick Joseph πŸ’œ5 years ago we purchased, Rescued and Restored a 118 year old farmhouse and we live together as a multigenerational household. Come follow our crazy. Isaiah 54:7
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